Total Sonic Action
by Cory the Hedgehog
Summary: Who's ready for more torture? Brought to you by your insane game host, JoAnne the Fox/ COry the Hedgehog. Send in your fan characters for a chance to win 1 million rings!
1. Total JoAnne Torture

The camera zoomed in on the Total Drama Action set, where JoAnne was walking out to the sidewalk to meet our contestants. She grinned at the camera. "Welcome to Total Sonic Action! That's the official name. The real one is Total JoAnne Torture."

Shadow jumped off a bus that had randomly appeared. "Fits." He threw a suitcase on the ground, seriously irritating JoAnne, and said, "So who are the others?"

The last winner, Leah, jumped off the bus, chatting happily with a horrified CHarge. "Shadow!" Hurricane raced over and squeezed him, irritating our host even more.

"Hey, guys!" Tails walked over. The four other contestants backed away, remembering when Tails had gone insane over tech and nearly ruined everything.

"Oh come on!" Bean ran up tot hem. "We got the craziness out of our system with JoAnne's fireworks!"

Shadow shrugged. Then Bean grabbed a box covered with Hello Kitty stamps and pulled something blue out of it. "SONIC, SAY HI!"

The big blue whatever fell to the ground. Surprisingly, it WAS the faker. Apprently, time in the box wasn't very good. He was freezing and hungry. JoAnne grinned. "You know what they saw. Give a man a fire and they'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire and he;l be warm fro the rest of his life." She threw some matches on our favorite show off.

"AAAAHHH!" Sonic ran around, screaming girly at the top of his lungs as he raced around the set, his quills practiacally burning off and everyone laughing their guts out. (I'll let you figure out if that was literal or not...)

"What the-" The final contestant, Eclipse, ran right into Sonic, setting her on fire too. The other victi-I mean, contestants, and host, laughed loud enough for people from Mexico to hear as the two hedgehogs ran around, screaming crazily.

Finally, JoAnne stood up and threw water on them. "WATER!" Sonic ran even faster, trying to get away from the 1 cm puddle.

JoAnne rolled her eyes, muttered, "Faker," and turned to the camera. "Who will be the six new fan characters? Who will be with them? And why are you still reading?"


	2. Elephant

The camera zoomed in on the Total SOnic Action set, where the victims from yesterday were waiting for the new contestants. Bean walked up to Sonic. "The elephant never forgets but I forget what the elephant remembers."

"WHat elephant?" Sonic asked, clearly perplexed by this simple piece of logic Bean had said. Then again, he's never been really bright has he? Fortunately, an elephant stepped on Sonic, making sure he didn't say anything else stupid.

"Good morning!" JoAnne was riding the elephant. "Ready to meet the newbies?"

"Depends." Eclispe looked at Sonic being suffocated. "If SOnic dies, do we get a new player?"

"Nope." JoAnne rode the elephant to the bus stop just as the bus appeared.

"WHat iz she doing here?" Antoine got off, and by his surprise of seeing JoAnne, he had bviously not watched TSI.

Mephiles jumped off next to him. "Well, one day her parents decided to create a terroristic abomnation. 14 years later..." He indicated the set. Antoine still looked baffled.

JoAnne growled at Mephiles and would've attacked if SHadow and Tails had not been holding her back. "Cool, a stare down!" Ray, the adorable flying squirrel, walked over. Leah suddenly raced over to him. "Um, would you please stop hugging me?"

"But your so huggable!" Leah replied, squeezing him even tighter.

"SHadow!" Black Doom, leader of the Black Arms, appeared in front of Shadow.

"WHat the hell?" Shadow jumped back, bashing into JoAnne, who flew into Mephiles, who flew into a black and red bat getting off.

"Hey, Grandad!"The bat waved.

Black Doom would've smiled if he had a mouth, then turned his attention on the cause of hundreds of fangirl fights interrupting his morning television, which was coincidentially his son. "One I win-"

"Yeah, yeah." JoAnne got up, glaring at Mephiles, who smiled innocently. "Blah blah blah." She turned to the bat. "Dillan! I thought Rouge was-"

"What'd you say about my mom?" Dillan grabbed a coincidentially placed trash can and throwing it at JoAnne, who juumped out of the way. It flew right into a blue she-fox getting off the bus. "Whoops. Sorry, Sky!"

"How long does he have to stay here?" JoAnne whispered to Shadow.

"Until Rouge gets out of jail." Shadow replied as Flare got off, glaring at his former teammates.

"SHADDYKUN!" A brown hedgehog barreled into 'Shaddykun', who bashed into JoAnne (again) who barreled into Mephiles (AGIAN) who flew into Dillan (again!).

"EVERYBODY STOP!" Dillan yelled, throwing another trash can.

JoAnne stood up, SweetPie in hand and several fangirls (and the Dark) in danger of losing conciousness. "The first challeneg is to-GET THAT ELEPHANT!" The aforementioned elephant was now rampaging Prower Mansion, shocking our favorite host so much she dropped SweetPie and ran at the elephant.

Dillan walked over and grabbed the gun. "Oh look, everybody. It's Mr. Shoot Host Button. Mr. Shoot Host Button is our friend." Geuss what happened then.

"NOOOO!" JoAnne ran around, trying to get the missiles that had suddenly appeared behinf her off her tail. Literally.

A few minutes later...

JoAnne carried the dead carcass of the elephant to her mansion (I'll give you a hint: missiles. Crazy fox. Elephant irritating her.) then stormed over to the contestants. "WHo pushed the button?" She yelled.

Everyone pointed at Dillan. "Well." JoAnne's tone said that Dillan would be recieving the same fate as Sonic. "Since I'll be thrown in jail if Dillan leaves, everyone's safe." Everyone breatehd a sigh of relief. "For now." Hmm, I wonder how they reacted to that.

JoAnne turned to the camera. "When will Rouge get out of jail (if ever)? Who will be voted off first? And why are you still reading?"


	3. Cannabalistic Bunnies Are Friends

JoAnne stomped out of her mansion to the assembled teams. "The chall-" Antoine flew out the Snoring Kangaroos window and landed in front of ouur insane host.

"Ow." Unfortunaely for the coyote, JoAnne was in a very violent mood. She picked him up and threw him into a field filled with flowers and violent, blood-sucking cannabilistic bunnies.

"WAIT, NO-" Ray also recieved Dillan's window throw, and also got a ticket to Evil Bunny Land.

"I like this kid!" Mephiles walked out, looking at Dillan, who was threatining Flare.

"As I was saying-" JoAnne was interrupted again as Marina was thrown by the totally calm and completely not violent Dillan into Shadow.

"GET THE HELL OFF ME!" The Ultimate Fangirl Attracter tried to pull Marina off him, unsuccesfully. JoAnne had a little more luck, and Marina decided to take a trip to Evil Bunny Land.

Dillan somehow avoided this cuddly and evil fate but also irritated JoAnne by throwing Sky out the window and complaining about the 'food'.

"The challenge is to-" Black Doom had just avoided the Out-the-window fate, but in the process landed on JoAnne. The hybrid was now severely angry, but was calm enough to offer Black Doom a ride to Evil Clown World. The alien, surprisingly, had a huge fear of clowns and ran screaming as fast as he could.

"You have to gather up all the bunnies and boil them!" JoAnne said as quickly as possible, going back tot he mansion as soon as she was finished.

*Make-Up Cam*

Shadow's POV

"THERE IS NO WAY I'M GOING INTO A MAKE-UP-" Geuss who got to go to Evil Bunny Land, courtesy of the completely not irritated JoAnne.

Sonic's POV

"Bunnies? That are cannibilistic? Where does she come up with this stuff?"

Charge's POV

Charge took out a gun that looked disturbingly familiar to SweetPie. "Oh, I won't be boiling any bunnies. Just a fox."

Leah's POV

"BUNNIES ARE OUR FRIENDS!" Apparently the bunny who lives in the make up tailer doesnt think so.

Hurricane's POV

"Bunnies. Cannabilistic bunnies. THAT DOESN'T EVEN MAKE SENSE!"

Eclipse's POV

"I shall open a black hole and then eat the bunnies! Wait, if they're cannibilistic, doesn't that mean they taste like blood?"

Tails' POV

"I KNEW she stole my bunnies!" And said bunnny is currently creeping toward the two tailed fox.

Bean's POV

"Bunny, bunny, bunny, funny bunny, gunny bunny..." Bean sang, petting one of te bunnies while looking down at the unconicous Tails.

SKy's POV

"NOOOO! NOT THE BUNNIES!" Hmm, I wonder what's going on in your crazy little brains...

Dillan's POV

_CRASH! _Apperently Dillan doesn't like being on camera.

One Cmaera Fix, Yelling Contest, and 200,000 dollars later...

Marina's POV

Screaming was heard outside as Marina ran in, her clothes completely torn. "THE BUNNIES ARE HERE! THEY'RE AFTER ME!" Well, either she's crazy or the cannibilistic bunnies have come...

Later...

Sonic ran after one of the bunnies with a stick that looked lke a tiny twig from the tiniest bush in the world. "Come here, bunny bunny...I won't hurt you, I jjust wanna eat you-AAAAAH!" Apprently bunnies don't like hearing that.

Shadow got out a chair and some popcorn and sat down to watch the show, the bunnies curling up in his lap. Apperently even cannibals can't resist him!

Dillan, still mad aout having to be on camera, began throwing everything he could reach at the bunnies, the other team, and his own teammates.

"NOO! THE FRNITURE IS FLYING!" Marina ran around, and eventually jumped onto Shadow's lap, startling the bunnies into attacking her and Shadow. AGAIN.

Sky joined with DIllan, and the two easily knocked out a few bunnies. "yes!" Dillan yelled.

"We're having rabbit for breakfast!" Sky held up one of the bunnies.

Mephiles had somehow gotten twenty bunnies, and sat on the pile while JoAnne scowled at him.

Black Doom was arguing with Shadow over whether hot sauce or tomato sauce was better on flesh.(...)

Leah had refused to hunt bunnies and was sitting in chains while surrounded by the bunnies she had tried not to kill. Oh painful irony!

"YI YI YI YIYAAA!" Beanw as dressed in indian clothing and holding a spear. "FEEL THE POINT!" He ran among the bunnies, randomly stabbing. "I-" Suddenly, one of the bunnies grabbed a trash can and bashed him over the head. "Feel like aking a nap." On top of cannabalistic bunnies.

Tails had stolen a helicopter from the mansion, and attached a knife to it, trying to get it close enough to stab one of the bunnies. Unfortunately, it seems cannablism turns them smart, for three of the bunnies jumped on the helicopter and tore it into bits. Or maybe they just like the taste of nails splitting their gums open.

Eclipse was true to her word, but just as she opened the black hole, she got distracted by an insanely cute baby bunny. "Aw!" She picked it up and stroked it, not noticing the black hole was sucking her into the dreaded Dora the Explorer land.

5 secodns alter...

"AAAAAHHH! RABID MONKEY!EVIL GIRL!" and that is why you keep an eye on black holes, toherwise Boots will mistake you for a theif and attack you and Dora will brainwash yo into joining her army of evil minions plotting to take over Colorado.

CHarge snuck up behind JoAnne, who was still glaring murderously at the Dark and whacked her over the head with SweetPie. "GET BACK HERE!" JoAnne spun around. Mephiles hacked her, and Charge and the Dark played Annoy The Host Until She Kills You for about two more minutes before Marina appeared, grabbed SweetPie, and ran off.

"SHADDYKUN IS MINE!" Marina yelled, shooting everything in sight. JoAnne grabbed Shadow's Chaos Emerald, Controlled in front of the fangirl, grabbed SweetPie, and Chaos Conrolled next to SHadow.

"Well, the Kangaroos got the most bunnies, or should I say ALL OF THE BUNNIES." JoAnne glared at Mephiles, who shrugged 'innocently'. "Sneezing Goats, see you at the Gilded Me Trophy!"

At the Ceremony...

JoAnne walked onto the stage, Shadow behind her, wearing the same dress Chef had and carrying a tray filled with trophies of the contestants. "Shadow." Shadow grinned and grabbed his, peeling the wrapping off to discover...CHOCOLATE!

"Sonic." JoAnne threw the trophy at his head, cuasing him t faint and miss the cannabalistic bunny appearing out of the trophy. "Just an accident! Bean." Bean was still in indian clothing, and yodeled something as he grabbed the trophy and stuck it in his mouth. "It's filled with explosives." JoAnne grinned as the trophy exploded inside the DYnamite's mouth.

"Charge, Leah, Hurricane." Eclipse, who had somehow escaped from Dora and Boots with only the monkey bites, glared at Tails, who looked pleadingly at his older sister. "Eclipse." Tails crossed his arms, glared at JoAnne, and stomped away, but not before the traiorous helicopter bearing an army of bunnies appeared in front of him with SweetPie.

"NOOOO-" Hmmm, cannabi,istic bunnies on a helicoper with a gun plus a two tailed fox right in front of them equals...

JoAnne turned to the camera. "Who will be voted off next? Will we ever get rid of the bunnies? And why are you still reading?"


	4. I know, I know, it sucks

JoAnne stomped out of the mansion to be greeted by the Snoring Kangaroos geting the Dillan Window Treatment. A few got a very wonderful trip to Evil Bunny Land.

After some more fun...

"Okay, the challenge is to reannact Romeo and Juliet." Everyone screamed. Well, if you were told to reannact a love play by a pyscho, how would you react. JoAnne grabbed some costumes. "Mephiles is Juliet for the Kangaroos." The Dark sputered and protested, but finally decided to get a ticket to Evil Bunny Land.

"Marina's Romeo. Sonic, Shadow, you tow are Romeo and Juliet." JoAnne walked away, and the faker fainted, landing an inch from Marina's hammer.

*Toilet Cam*

Mephiles' POV

"All I did was kill her parents!"

Shadow's POV

Shadow's video has been heavily censored. Thank you, the Censory Contro-

Shadow appears and starts shooting stuff randomly.

Sonic's POV

Sonic screamed so unearthly, it cannot be described in English. Therefore, try to figure out what this is! Sonic está gritando acerca de JoAnne tirar los pasteles trasero mono de distancia, él es totalmente emocionados por fingir que se enamora de las Sombras.

Marina's POV

"HE LOOKS LIKE SHADDYKUN!"

Later...

JoAnne got out a chair, some popcorn, a flame retardant suit, a pile of guns and bombs, and something that looked like medication labeled, "For fakers and psychos only."

The Snoring Kangaroos were up first. They did the balcony scene. Mephiles lounged sullenly, and said in the dullest voice ver, "Romeo, Romeo, where areth thee Romeo?" The bad grammar got a shot in his head from JoAnne.

Marina appeared, riding Dillan, who looked evry much like he wanted to kill someone. "Shall I hear more, or speak at this?"

Mephiles yawned (got another head shot), and tiredly replied, "Tis your name that is your enemy. Blah blah blah (I think it doesn't need to be said he got a bullet shot), that which we call a rose is by any othe rname just as sweet."

Marina seemed pleased at how 'well' they were doing, and sang, "Henceforth, I will never be-" At that point, Sky had staretd arguing with Antoine for somer eason we shall never know. The supposedly cowardly coyote drew out his sword and backed Sky onto the stage.

Glancing around, she quickly sung, "La la LAAAAA!" Unfortunately, this broke the eardrums of everybody nearby, and the Dark started yelling at his teamate, which got him ANTOHER bullet.

"Over!" JoAnne called. "4 out of 10 points. NEXT!"

The other team had decided to do the death scene. Shadow, as Romeo, lay on a homemade tomb thing made out of dead leftover bunnies. Sonic appeared, wearing a long dress suspiciously like one of JoAnne's. (One bullet for Sonic). "Oh Romeo! My love-"

"Over!" JoAnne called again. "1 point out of 10!"

"WHat!" Shadow sat up, knocking his head on the stage.

"DON'T AGURE!"JoAnne stood up, holding SweetPie and glaring so ferociously it would have made Dora seem normal. "CEREMONY, NOW!" No one argued.

At the Ceremony.

JoAnne appeared, Shadow holding the plate of trophies, in his Romeo costume. "Sonic." Sonic was still wearing the dress as he revieced the trophy and a bullet.

"Leah, CHarge. Hurricnae, Shadow." Bean was for soem reason licking a bunny's eye. Eclipse grinned as JoAnne called, "Eclipse."

Bena had not realized he had to leave. Or maybe he did for he jumped up, yelling, "FACE THE EYEBALL!" He stripped his clothes off and ran.

JoAnne turned tot he camera. "Afully short, eh? What movie will we rip off next? Will Bean get his clothes back? And why are you still reading?"


	5. This Is Why I Should Make The Games

The two teams grudgingly walked out of their cabins at 4:09 in the morning as JoAnne rang the wake-up call. Suddenly, in front of both of the teams, wormholes appeared.

"Mpehiles!" Marina yelled.

"Don't look at me!" The Dark protested. "That demon took my powers, remember?"

"Well, I-" But we may never get to find out what Leah thought, becuase the wormholes had just sucked the two teams.

JoAnne appeared ont he ridge, slightly bemused. "Hm. Looks like I get the day off. LET'S MAKE CHEESE!"

With Snoring Kangaroos

"GETOFFAME!" Sky yelled, whacking Antoine on the head.

"Where are we?" Mephiles got up, looking aorund.

"Looks like a cross between hell and Barney world." Dillan muttered.

"THE IBLIS TRIGGER!" A silver hedgehog exploded out of some nearby bushes. He looked aorund and saw the Kangaroos. "Hey, have you seena blue hedgehog?"

Ray screamed. "White! I'm allergic to white!"

Mephiles regarded Silver. "Hm, you look familiar? Have I threatened you before?"

Sky blinked. "Wait,y ou don't know him? In SOnic 06-"

"OH GOD!" Marina screamed. "WE'RE TRAPPED IN SONIC 06!"

With the Sneezing Pandas...

CHarge stood up and brushed himself off. "Where are we?" He looked around.

Sonic suddenly bounced up and down like an annoying five year old. "It''s Spagonia!"

Leah blinked. "Is that a kind of noodle?"

Hurricane rolled her eyes. "At least I played Sonic Unleashed. Spagonia's a city Sonic goes to."

SOnic nodded. "I was shopping for the Cheese Maker game, and I came here, and then I had to stop...what's his name, Eggy?Yeah, I fought Eggy and then I got hurt and when I woke up I was-"

"WEREHOG!" Eclispe pointed at another Sonic, who was walking down a street, one of his arms all furry.

"Yeah, that word!" Sonic nodded. Shadow whacked him on the head.

Bean blinked. "If we're in Spagonia, doesn't that mean we're in-"

"We're in SOnic Unleashed?" Charge groaned. "Of all the games in the world, it HAD to be this one."

"Hey!" Sonic glared at him. "This game isn't-Look, it's Chip!" SOnic ran over to the hot dog stand.

"Chip?" Leah blinked. "Like chocolate chip?" She followed Sonic eagerly.

With the Kangaroos...

The Kangaroos had somehow ended up following Silver around as he looked through Soleanna for Sonic. Mephiles yawned. "you know, I think JoAnne lives somewhere close here." The others hurriedly said they should go in the oppostie direction.

Suddenly, Sonic walking with...uh, what's her name? Annoying Girly? Yeah. "THE IBLIS TRIGGER!" Silver launched himself at Sonic.

"Popcorn anyone?" Flare grinned and grabbed a random chair as Annoying Girly screamed.

"SILVER, don't!" Before the show could get good and the faker got what was coming, Amy appeared and glared at the white hedgehog.

Black Doom threw a bit of popcorn at her. "Get on with the show!"

With the Sneezing Pandas...

"Look!" Bean pointed at a flying...thingy that looked like a big eared squirrel with wings. "Go, pokeball!"

Chip was eating a chocolate smoothie. "I like-" The pokeball hit him on the head. Hard. "Napping." The thingabahooy disapeared, leaving the manhog (that's the translation) to act like the idiot he is.

"Hey, me!" Sonic ran up to...himself.

"Paradox!" Sonic the Manhog threw the sundae into the air and ran screaming.

"Food!" Hurricane tried to grab the sundae, but it unfortunately landed on her face.

"Human!" Charge pointed at a little girl staring at him. "Evilness!"

Shadow facepalmed. "Of course."

With JoAnne...

JoAnne watched the two teams from a computer in the mansion. "Hmm, I really need to fix those wormholes..."

With the SNoring Kangaroos...

"I blame you." Marina glared at Mephiles.

"WHat?" The Dark glared back. "How is it my fault we got stuck witht he most annoying fangirl ever and a white cockatoo who can't sing?"

"THE IBLIS TRIGGER!" Silver jumped at them. "I FOUND THEM!" He pointed at an ant.

All of the contestants facepalmed as Amy came. "SONIKUU!" She squeezed Flare.

"Well, least it can't get worse." Ray muttered.

"DON'T JINX-" But before that sentence could be finished, Eggbutt appeared, the annoying faker chasing him.

"Muhahah!" The doctor cackled madly as he flew by with Annoying Girly.

"I'll take care of him." Mephiles declared, sending a blast of energy at Eggbutt.

BOOM.

Dillan groaned. "Owie." He stood up. "We're back home!"

"DOn't you mean we're back in the torture chamber?" Marina muttered.

"Hellooo!" JoAnne skipped down to meat them. (figure out if that was a typo or not).

"Wuzzhappun?" Sky swayed slightly.

JoAnne smirked. "You'll find something waiting for you in your cabins. Good luck." They blinekd in surprise. "You'll need it."

Witht he Sneezing Pandas...

"GO, SQUIRREL DUDE!" Bean yelled, throwing the pokeball.

"Squirrel dude?" Hurricane repeated.

"HOW DO WE GET OUTTA HERE?" Charge yelled, brandishing a stick as the little girl came near.

Near the hot dog stand, SOnic and SOnic were deep in conversation. Involving chili dogs.

Shadow was polishing his gun and glaring at a fanclub nearby.

"HEDGEHOG!" Eggy the Eggbutt appeared. "And...hedgehog?"

"EGGMAN!" The faker and manhog yelled at once. "What's your evil plan this time?"

Eggy Eggbutt smirked as evilly as he could (which isn't really that much). "Bombs." He tok out a few. "Now watch your precious city crumble!"

"I don't even live here." Sonic and Sonic said at the same time.

"SQURRIEL DUDE, TACKLE THE FAT GUY!" Bean screamed as a very annoyed Chip threw himself at Eggbutt the Egghead as he threw the bombs.

Three things happened. One, there was a huge explosion. B, another wormhole opened. (only this one needed cleaning. Are wormholes suposed to have mutant rats crawling around?) And 4hQ, the Shadow fangirls turned into a category of enemies all their own: deranged and obsessive fanclub not wanting their heor go.

"LEGGOOFME!" Shadow yelled, pulling at the fangirls. "Or I'll shoot you!"

BOOM.

"Hey, where'd me go?" Sonic wondered aloud as he stood up. At the TSI set.(funny, he fell in Spagonia and landed in Tormentia)

"To a happy place." JoAnne replied, grinning as screams of horror emanated from the Kangaroo cabins. "Where's SHadow?"

"In a not happy place." CHarge replied, trying to calm Leah.

Bean looked down sadly at his pokeball. "Bye bye, Squirrel dude."

"Now, off to your cabins." JoAnne smirked evilly as the tired contestants went unsuspectedly to meet yet another horror.

JoAnne turned to the camera. "Will Shadow ever get out of the evil world of fangirls? What horror is in the cabins (and do we even want to know)? And why are you still reading?"


	6. Slap, Slap, Die

A red fox walked down to the contestants. Sonic looked up, surprised. "Fiona, what the-"

She slapped him across the face. "JoAnne's taking a vacation. She told me to do an after math. You're co host."

The faker spluttered and protested as Fiona dragged him up to the mansion.

Tails walked in, saying, "JoAnne, I'm suing you for-FIONA?"

The fox smiled. "Cute as ever." She kissed Tails on the cheek, who promptly fainted.

Sonic was sweatdropping like there was no tomorrow. "Um, Fiona, I can see you don't need any-"

Fiona smiled at him. "You really want to go?" Of course Mr. Faker can't resist that look, which is probably why all of his 1870304 girlfriends have slapped him at least twice.

"So, uh, Tails, why, uh, doy uo think you were, uh, voted off?" Sonic was staring at Fiona.

Tails glared a thim. "Becuase my psychotic sister is a LITTLE THEIVING-" Tails' reply has been heaviyl censored. Thank you.

Fiona laughed and Tails fainted again. Sonic shifted nervously as Fiona asked, "So what was the best part?"

"Leaving." Tails replied tartly.

Sonic grinned, seeing a chance to 'impress' Fiona. "Really? You thought getting attacked by carnivorous bunnies was the best?"

Tails glared furiouslt at him as Fiona giggled and winked at Sonic, who continued sweatdroppinng.

"How do you feel about being the first voted off?" Fiona asked.

"I FEEL LIKE A BETRAYED LITLE BROTHER OF A-" Censored. Again.

"What would you have done with the money?" Sonic asked through clenched teeth, making a mental note to tell JoAnne Tails had gotten scuff marks on her rug.

"Bought THIS!" Tails whipped out a poster for a toaster.

"Um...Why?" Fiona looked at him like he was insane. Who knows, with a sister like JoAnne.

"Becuase it's the Universal Toaster 20048!" Tails yelled, as if this was the simplest thing in the world. "You can watch tv, surf the internet, play mini games, and make toast!"

The hosts blinked. "Well thanks for your time, Tailsy." Sonic hurried him out the door as the two tail started screaming about his sister, revenge, and pie.

Bean walked in, holding fourteen pokeballs and yodeling, "Coconuts, coconuts, coconuts-"

"So, Bean, why do you think you were voted off?" Sonic interrupted, glancing at Fiona, who was bent over, laughing.

Beans shrugged and continued yodeling. "Maybe I shouldn't have stuck those bombs in your beds after all?"

Sonic stopped staring at Fiona. "What?"

Bean grinned. "They're set to go off in-" geuss what just exploded.

Sonic screamed as Fiona rolle don the floor. "My teddy bear! Tedted!" The faker ran out of the mansion, screaming for his teddy.

Fiona got up, trying to stop laughing. "I wonder what happened to the dragon eggs?" Bean wondered.

Fiona feel to the floor again, laughing crazily.

Later...

JoAnne walked into the TSA set as Fiona came out to greet her, Sonic following like a puppy. A pathetic, begging, overspoiled-

"How'd everything go, cuz?" JoAnne asked, looking around at the burnt Sneezing Panda cabins and Hurricane running around as a baby dragon sniggled up to Leah, who had jumped back into CHarge's arms.

"Get it offa me!" Marina ran out, a small purple dragon halfway through eating her head.

Fiona shrugged. "Just another normal day." She walked out as a dark grey wolf walked in, glaring at Sonic.

"Leena, what-" And his 1870305th girlfriend slaps him.

JoAnne turned to the contestants, dragons, and faker who was rolling around crying. "Tomorrow will be a three part Harry Potter challenge!"

Silver appeared, in an orange and white stripped and ruffled dress. He had black tap shoes on as he can-canned around, singing annoyingly, "Harry Harry Pot-tah! Harry Harry Pot-tah! Harry Harry Pot-tah!"

*Make Up Cam*

Flare's POV

"I am now scarred for life."

Silver in his dress appeared, still singing as the camera went blank.


	7. Cauldrons, CrossHeads, and Faker

JoAnnne walked out to the assembled teams, holding several cauldrons, a bag of ingredients, and a chair with a built in popcorn maker and fire proof umbrella.

"Good morning everyone!" She dumped the stuff on the ground. The first challenge is to create dinner using only Potions ingredients from Harry Potter."

*Make Up Cam*

Shadow's POV

"Of course. How did I not suspect?"

Sonic picked up one of the bags. "What is this?"

Charge examined it closely. "Armadillo bile." He handed it to the shocked Sonic and grabbed a bag of wormwood.

Leah looked into the cauldron. "Um, is it supposed to be green?" Indeed, the potion inside was a bright shade of green.

Hurricane shrugged. "Maybe it tastes like brocili?"

"We need a test rat." Shadow announced, dipping a spoon in.

Everyone looked at Sonic, who had mixed sloth brains and armadillo bile for a refreshing drink.

With the Sneezing Kangaroos...

Marina picked up a bag of..."Um, are these quills?"

JoAnne looked up from where she was recording the Panda's attempts. "Yep. Hedgehog's." Marina promptly fainted.

Mephiles dropped some wormwood in and stirred it. "Looks like we're having Euphoria tonight!" Flare cackled as he dropped castor beans in. Marina fainted again.

Later...

JoAnne walked over to the Snoring Panda's cauldron. It was bright orange. She dipped a finger in. "Hmm, tsk tsk, ah well." She walked over to the Kangaroo's as the Panda's looked into the cauldron worriedly. It burned Leah's face fur to a crisp.

Sonic dipped his finger in and sucked on it. "Yum!"

JoAnnre peered into the Kangaroo's cauldron. "Polyjuice Potion?" She glared at them. "Attempting to worm out of here?" They hurriedly shook their heads. "LIARS!" JoAnne took out a wand. I'll give you three geusses.

Later...

JoAnne grinned at the singed Kangaroos and the Panda's, who were attempting to revive Sonic. "The second challenge..." She took out a wand as a bull's eye thingy appeared. "Is to curse Mephiles until he's knocked unconcious. Or worse."

*Make Up Cam*

Mephiles' POV

Sadly, Mephiles' POV had to be heavily censored. Hmm, I wonder if it had anything to do with JoAnne.

Leah grinned as she tok out a wand and aimed it at Mephiles, tied up to the bull's eye. "FURNUNCULUS!" Unfortunately, the wand she had taken was Ron's old one.

"LOCOMOTOR MORTIS!" Sonic's was, however, useless, as Mephiles couldn't move.

CHarge smirked and yelled, "MUTATIO SKULLUS!" Mephiles' skull began to shift and, after a fifteen second grotesque development, became a giant cross.

Shadow flicked his wand lazily, muttering, "Histedius." Sveral green rings burned Mephiles, to the delight of JoAnne.

"MUTALIA!" Mephiles' already mutilatedf face suddenly burst out in pimples.

Marina cackled and screamed, "CRUCIO!" Mephiles would have screamed, if the Mutatio Skullus hadn't gotten rid of his ability to talk. But I'm sure what he would have said would have been very pleasant. Or censored.

Flare perfomed a Slug Vomiting jinx to roaring applause.

Dillan and Black Doom both yelled, at the same time, "AVADRA KEDAVRA!"

JoAnne took out hers, lazily flicked the spell away and announced, "The Panda's win the second. Please choose two contestants, and have them come to the mansion." She smiled evilly, and conveniently forget to untie Mephiles, who will now be known as Cross-Head.

AT the Mansion...

Sonic and Black Doom looked nervously at each other as they door opened, revealing JoAnne, sitting at a fortune-teller's table. She smiled pleasantly (though i'm sure Black Doom and Sonic would have said different) and told them, "The challenge is to-" she flicked her wand, making a group of Inferi appear. "Fight them. And survive." Guess how they reacted.

"INCENDIO! INCENDIO!" The Inferi dropped. Sonic grinned. "I feel all warm and fuzzy now."

"That's because you're on fire." And I'm sure he reacted normally. Or maybe not, as more Inferi were grabbing him as his quills exploded.

"FIENDFYRE!" Half of the Inferi exploded over Black Doom. Sonic screamed as the Inferi began munching on his bones. Black Doom yelled, "INFERIO!" Unfortunately, his wand had soemhow backfired, causing the Inferi to go after him.

Sonic rubbed his arm where the Inferi had bit him. "Am I going to turn into a zombie now?"

JoAnne looked at him. "And here I thought you couldn't get any dumber. Well." She took out her wand, making the Inferi disappear. "Sonic wins. Get on out of here, Pink Foom."

"IT'S PINK DOOM!" Yelled the alien as he glided out angrily.

JoAnne turned to the camera, Sonic whimpering behind her. "What will be the next challenge? Will Mephiles' head ever get back to normal? And why are you still reading?"


	8. Complete And Utter Normality

JoAnne walked down to the contestants, who were watching two of the baby dragons kill each other. "Good morning, everyone! Today, the contest will be taking place on the beach." They all appeared on a cloudy Cali beach. "While you all fight pettily over this." She held up a wishing rock and all the contestants eyes shone with greed. "See yaz in an hour."

5 seconds later...

"GIVE ME IT!" Mephiles yelled, grabbing at the rock.

"NO!" Marina grabbed it back. "I need it to make Shadow fall in love with me!"

Shadow sat in a beach chair, recording the excitement.

The rock flew into Leah's hands. "I wish-" Unfortunately, we shall never know the end of that sentence, as Sonic had grabbed the rock and yelled, "FOR A CHILI DOG!"

A giant 5 foot chili dog landed on the two hedgehogs, and the wishing rock flew over to CHarge. "I wish for a million-"

Sonic had somehow escaped the chili dog, grabbed the rock, and yelled, "Chili dogs!" Well, I think you can imagine what happened then. I don't think the Pacific will ever be the same.

Ray scramble dover to the rock, but Mephiles beat him there. "I wish JoAnne was-"

Sonic grabbed the rock, again, finishing, "A CHILI DOG!"

Marina grabbed the rock from Mephiles, who grabbed it back, who grabbe dit back, who...you get the idea.

Flare burned both of them and ran off with the rock.

Sonic screamed girlily and fainted at not getting more chili dogs. One of the said chili dogs landed on him.

Eclipse ran after him, Leah struggling behind, and SHadow laughing and recording everything.

Later...

Flare sat on top of a tree, continually wishing for more and more comets to hit the earth, while he laughed maniacally. "BURN!" Eclipse jumped up and tackled him.

"MINE!" She held it up then ran off, just like Flare.

Sonic, SHadow, and Mephiles followed her.

Charge and Leah, both suffering from the chili dog attack, crawled behind.

Somewhere On An Island...

"I WANT MY CHILI DOGS!" Sonic launched himself at Marina, who had somehow gotten the rock.

Mephiles kicked him intot he ocean. "Give it so I can kill JoAnne!" The Dark yelled at the hedgehog.

Charge, with Leah riding him, had somehow crawled tot he island with only a group of carnivorous crabs to show for it.

"Wishing..." Leah fell off, and another giant chli dog fell on her. "Rock." A random giant pie also fell.

A few hours, some arguing, a couple of slaps, and a thousand chili dogs later...

JoAnne paddled to the island. Mephiles has still fighting with Marina, Eclipse was taking a 'nap', Sonic was eating all the chili dgs he could find, Charge was helping Leah get out of yet another giant pie, and Shadow was recording Ray scream fearfully at the white sand.

"Well, this looks exciting!" JoAnne smiled evilly. "Now, off to see who your teams hate the most." Everyone looked at Ray, who had caused most of the damage.

He continued to scream as he was forced into a white limo by Sonic, who was still eating chili dogs.

JoAnne turned to the camera. "Will we ever get the chili dogs out of the ocean? Did I forget to mention anyone (if so, sorry)? And why are you still reading?"


	9. What Movie Is This?

The eight contestants wakled out to the spot where JoAnne usually met them. Today, however, she was seen holding a bunch of bags and running, yelling, "MURDER! MURDER! GET ME OUTTA HERE!"

"...Is this the challenge?" Sonic wondered aloud.

"Moron." Sky muttered. "Obviously it's-Hey!" The fox had just stubbed her toe on a disc thingy with a button on it. "Cool." She pressed the button and a mini JoAnne popped out of it.

"If you idiots are watching this, CONGATULATIONS! A crazy murderer is wandering around camp and he has his eyes on one of you. Good luck!"

Everyone looked at Mephiles. "Hey, I can barely teleport, let alone kill someone, since that deom took my powers!" The Dark protested.

"Well, looks like we have to find this murderer." Shdow announced.

Sonic screamed girlily. "No! What if we die?"

Dillan rolled his eyes. And a trash can at Sonic. "Auntie's (yes, he calls JoAnne auntie) not gonna let us die."

Shadow looked at his son. "Obviously you haven't been on the island."

Later, with the Pandas...

Shadow had somehow gotten a gun and was walking around the sewers for some reason with the rest of the Pandas.

"Um, guys?" Leah looked around, clutching a stinkbomb. "Did you hear that?"

"Probably rats." Charge muttered. Then, the lights went dark (lights in sewers?) and they all heard Leah scream.

"AAAHH!" And then, of course, Sonic screamed and somehow got out of the sewers, leaving Charge and Shadow alone.

Or maybe just Charge...

With the Kangaroos...

A blue sparrow walked into a room with JoAnne. "Tea, milady?" Oops. Bad camera!

Dillan, for some reason known only to himself (and for some reason, I doubt that), was throwing furniture and food at a warehouse.

Sky was recording this and eating popcorn she had found, labeled, "Sewer Popcorn: So good, you can still taste the rats!"

Mephiles had gotten a gun and was shooting a cut out of JoAnne. "Hehehehe-"

"Hey, where'd Muphelaz go?" Marina wondered.

"Who cares?" Flare said.

"HEY, WHO ARE YOU?" Knuckles the worst guardian ever suddenly appeared. "I'm confused! DIE!"

A random waiter walked up to the echidna, who was beating up Mephiles, who was still beating up the JoAnne cut out. "Hello sir. Would you like soup or salad?"

"CONFUSED!" Knuckles began beating up the waiter.

"GET IN HERE FAKER!" Sonic, who was eating a chili dog in front of the warehouse, was suddenly dragged into a nice dark spot for couple's- I mean, a perfect spot for murder! Yeah, murder.

Later...

"Congratulations!" JoAnne walked down to them. "You all suck! Have some cookies!" A rain of cookies fell upon them.

"Yum!" CHarge grabbed one. "EW! Oatmeal with..."

"Rat poo." JoAnne finished.

"Hey, where's Leah?" SHadow asked.

JoAnne smirked evilly. "Oh don't worry..." Insert screams of horror here.

"..." Insert freaked-out ness and soda here.

JoAnne turned to the camera. "What happened to Leah? Why did I make such a sucky, random chapter? WHO CARES?" She threw a pie witht he words, "Why are you still reading?" at the screen.

Insert black screen and laughter.


	10. Star Wars: Revenge of Indiana Idiot

"GOOD MORNING!" JoAnne yelled.

"SHUT UP!" At three o' clock. Unfortuntely, for that outbust, Shadow got a bullet in his head and JoAnne got attacked by fangirls.

After sime broken teeth, a broken window, and tons of screaming and visits to Happy Happy Bunny Land, the contestants assembled in front of JoAnne. "The challenge is to use these lightsabers and map," She passed the said items to the teams, "to go on a long, pointless, frustrating journey in which my minions will try to stop you while you try to find Leah. Good luck!"

I have a feeling no one heard any of this as Dillan was attempting to strangle Mephiles for touching his toaster.

Later...

"Well..." Sonic looked at the map as Shadow got tackled by fangirls. "Looks like we head to a big cliff. It's supposed to be really big, cliffy, and...big."

"Wow." Charge rolled his eyes. "That's gonna be sooo hard to find. Especially since it's right in front of us. So hard."

Sonic glared at him. "So how do we get across, Mr. Sarcastic?"

Shadow, finally free of the fangirls, walked to the edge. "Hmm, I think-" We shall never get to know what the Ultimate Fangir Attracter thought, though, as he made a small diversion by falling.

"Great." Charge looked down. "Now who am I going to blackmail?"

"Aw, shut-You blackmailed Shadow-I don't want to know." Sonic shook his head.

With the Kangaroos...

"Hmmm." Marina looked at the map while Mephile aand Dillan argued over what was cooler: guns or exploding cats.

"Looks like the Pandas are having toruble." Sky smirked as Sonic yelled at Charge.

"MEPHILES!" Marina yelled.

"Yes, demon?" Mephiles replied, fingering his spiked gloves.

"Make a bridge."

"And if I don't?"

"Then I'll tell JoAnne who ate her cookies." Marina smirked.

Mephiles sweatdropped. "Um, okay."

With the Pandas...

Sonic, having gotten irritated enough to turn into Super Sonic, dragged the unconcious Shadow as they walked along the path. "Hmmm, says their's supposed to be a bunch of...rabid monkeys?"

"Oh, that's not so bad." CHarge muttered.

Sonic stared at him. "You've never been on the set of Random Sonic." He took out a Chaos Emerald and tried to wake up Shadow.

Charge the Idiot walked straight into a field filled with monkeys on drugs, Hannah Montana and Selena Gomez singing Silver's theme, cannabalistic bunnies, a hedgehog like Shadow, only with blue stripes, and Leah dancing.

"AAAAAHH!" It was either the horror f the sight or the monkeys trying to claw his guts out that induced Charge's scream.

Sonic and a very grumpy Shadow ran intot he clearing and nearly screamed.

With the Kangaroos...

The Kangaroos, or should I say Sky and Marina, Dillan being busy with pounding Mephiles, heard the commotion and hurried into the field.

I'll just say that Dillan and Mephiles were lucky to not hear Hannah's guitar solo. They ran in five seconds later to see Sky and Marina fainting while monkeys banged on their heads with spoons.

"Okay..." Mephiles took in the scene. DIllan, used to such things, ran over to Leah, grabbed her, and ran like Death was after him. Actually, WORSE was after him. Hannah Montana, eager for an audience, 'sang', "YA YA YA, LET'S DANCE-" Thank you Mephiles, for carrying guns, you psycho.

At the set...

Dillan and Leah, still dancing around like she could still hear Hannah Monthorror, walked in. JoAnne, watching the whole thing from hidden cameras, greeted, "Congrats! You suck! Have a cookie while we wait for the rest to come back."

20 Days Later...

...

5 Days Later...

JoAnne, seeing the rest walk in (after 25 days of monkeys high and Horror MontHorror singing), said, "Well, the Kangs are one member short."

"Really?" Mephiles looked around.

Rouge landed beside JoAnne and grabbed Dillan's ear. "You're in big trouble!" She glared at Dillan's teammates.

JoAnne smiled. "Good luck." She turned to the camera as Rouge yelled at the teammates for no reason. "What movie will we rip off next? Will Horror Monthorror ever learn to sing? And why are you still reading?"


	11. 2012 The Musical

JoAnne smiled at the seven contestants. "Guess what we're ripping off today?"

"The We Get To Go Home And Never COme Back movie?" Flare asked.

"Nope!" JoAnne grinned evilly, promising many bad things and perhaps a free trip to Dora World. "Camp Rock."

"AAAH!" Sonic screamed. "Not the evil Disney!"

JoAnne sighed. "I don't get paid enough for this." SweetPie immediately turned into fifteen connected guns, three bombholders, and a couple of knife throwers.

If Sonic's jaw could have dropped farther, it would be burning in the Earth's core.

"Now..." JoAnne took out two guitars, a drum set and some keyboards from seemingly nowhere. "Charge, Flare, stand on the stage."

"What stage?" Flare, who had gotten only hour of sleep due to Marina...doing painful things to Mephiles, let's say.

JoAnne facepalmed. "SO not enough." Poor Flare.

Later...

Flare stood on the stage, holding a guitar. CHarge was nearby, holding drumsticks and looking ecstatic even though they were on a cheap stage above a pit of carnivoruos bunnies.

JoAnne grinned. "Aaaaand, ROCK!"

Flare immediately started strumming. "It starts with one thing so we start to see that everything you do it all leads back to me."

Charge replied with a quick rock.

Flare glared and started singing again. "When I look back now I wish we could go back in time to when when we all had fun before I had to rhyme."

JoAnne, getting bored, pulled a conveniently placed rope and both rockers landed among the bunnies.

SHadow yawned and asked, "Who won?"

JoAnne smirked. "I never said that was the challenge." She hit a button. "Welcome to 2012. Live, and you win. Lose, and...let's just say you may not make it to the lame-o-sine."

The ground started to tremble. Flare and CHarge, still in the bunny pit, screamed. They lasted four seconds.

"You have GOT to be kidding." Sonic muttered.

JoAnne took out SweetPie again. "I. Don't. Kid."

Sky grinned and took out a jet pack. "See ya, suck-ahs!" She shooted into the sky. "WHEEEEEE-Ow-" Looks like the monsters are keeping full.

Marina laughed maniacally and pointed her wand at Mephiles. The Dark groaned and teleported them to a place hopefully filled with happy bunnies selling lollypops.

Leah ran around randomly, screaming "MOMMY!" while Shadow read a magazine. JoAnne, getting bored, turned up the earthquakes.

Leah screamed loud enough i'm sure Australia heard it, and jumped into Shadow's arms. The magazine flew into a hurricane. "Wonderful." He looked at JoAnne. "When does this end."

"When I get paid."

20 days later...

"Money. Now." JoAnne demanded of a lawyer, while Leah whacked at a eighteen legged octopus, Flare ran around a volcano happily, and Shadow continued reading a magazine.

The lawyer looked uncomfortable. "Um. We're...broke?"

JoAnne twitched and turned to the contestants, which numbered five, since Marina and Sky had kindly joined them and were now bathing a squid's stomach.

"Okay, then, peeps. You get to sleep here until the stupid heads learn that I don't accept no as an asnwer." She turned to the camera. "How will the contestants live without money? What happened to that little CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED and the faker no one cares about? And why are you still reading?"


	12. Horray For Pointlessness

JoAnne, holding a pile of balls, walked down tot he remaining campers. "Ready for your daily allowance of red rubber?"

Shadow yawned. Marina asked, "Do we get to be on tv?"

"You're already on tv, moron." Leah retorted at the other fangirl.

"I AM?" Marina turned to the camera. "HI MOM!"

JoAnne knocked her out and threw the balls at the contestants. "Have fun, i'll be back in a few hours if you're nto dead!" She's really nto a good host...

Later...

Sky picked up one of the balls, glaring at the other team.

CHarge was lying on the ground, staring at the sky. "Ugh, I need some real food."

"i think my stomach ate my stomach." Flare muttered, throwing half heartedly at Marina.

"Don't be a baby!" Leah picked up a pile and threw them. "This isn't the time to give up!"

Charge looked at his watch. "Now is it?"

Shadow looked up from his magazine. Leah was throwing like a maniac and Marina and Sky were having trouble just dodging. "Shadow, help!"

"I'm just gonna smile I and pretend I don't know what's going on."

"DIE, DIE DIE, DIE!" Leah yelled, throwing even crazier.

*Confessional*

Leah's POV

"Life isn't trying to pass me by: it's trying to kill me. So, I'm gonna win and throw the money at it!"

"Congratulations, you still suck!" JoAnne greeted them. "Have some cookies that are completely not poisonous."

"Who won?" Shadow asked. "And why do I care?"

"The Kangaroos."

"WHAT?" Charge and Flare sat up, both holding the carcasses of bunnies. "How?"

FLASHBACK

"SHADOW IS MINE!" Marina launched herself at Leah.

"MOMMY!"

END FLASHBACK

"Isn't that illegal?" Sky muttered. Marina glared at her.

"Anyways, Shadow, the lame-o-sine is waiting." Marina and Leah screamed.

"NO, SHADOW, DON'T LEAVE!" They threw themselves at Shadow while JoAnne glared at her watch. "PLEASE! DON'T GO, WE'LL DO ANYTHING!"

Shadow looked at JoAnne. "THIS is why i voted myself off." He shook the fangirls off and stomped into the lame-o-sine. "I hope you all die."

JoAnne smiled at the horrfied fangirls and turned to the camera. "Why does this chappie seem pointless?"

In the distance, a familiar, waffle loving voice screamed, "HORRAY FOR POINTLESSNESS!"

"Who will be voted off next? And why are you still reading?"


	13. TwiCrazy

JoAnne stomped over to the remaining contestants. "Well, my lawyers said we have to do Twilight." Flare and CHarge gasped with horror. "Leah, you're Bella. Figure out the other roles and the worst leaves and never, never, nerver, never, comes back." She stomped away, muttering, "Stupid lawyers."

Flare stood up. "I shall be Edward, since I'm the best actor.

Marina laughed insanely. "Since when?" Flare replied by setting her on fire. "FIRE! YAY!"

Charge looked at them and thought, "How did I get into this?" "Um. I'll be Jacob."

"No, CHarge should be Edward!" Leah protested. "After all, he is the cutest, after Shadow."

"And I am?" FLare asked.

"Chopped liver!" Marina yelled.

*Confessional Cam*

Charge's POV

"Someone save me. Now."

Sky shrugged. "I'll be Alice."

Leah and Flare were glaring at each other when JoAnne stomped back. "Let's make this nice and simple. Find out roles in five seconds or go boom boom."

*Confessional Cam*

Sky's POV

"I cna't tell who would be worse: her or Chris. At least Chris wouldn't shoot stuff at us. ...Would he?"

In the end, JoAnne made them reennact the scene from Eclipse where they're fighting mutant zombie vampires.

"Mutant zombie vampires?" Leah looked at the script. "That isn't in the movie at all."

JoAnne looked up from her popcorn. "No, but do you really want to stand on a set with CHarge while vampires are trying to kill each other around you?"

Charge glared at her. "Can I leave?"

JoAnne smirked. "But then you'd leave Flare to the mercy of all these fangirls."

*Confessional Cam*

Charge's POV

"WHy can't there be more guys here?"

Later...

"Oh, Jacob, save me!" Leah called while the mutant zombie vampires (sky and Marina) swarmed her.

CHarge walked onto the set, wearing a dog costume. "I'll save you, Bella." He walked over and punched Marina in the face.

"HOW DARE YOU!" Marina screamed, launching herself at Charge.

"YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO SAVE ME!" Leah also attacked Charge.

Flare rolled on the set, laughing, while Sky watched nervously. JoAnne yawned, stood up, and hit a conveniently appearing gong. "Okay, people, you all sucked. So while you go scream at the baby mutant monkeys I put in your cabins, I'm going to find out who to vote off."

She turned to the camera. "WHat will happen now that CHarge and Sky are the only sane people here? Who should I vote off? And why are you still reading?"


	14. Eenie Meenie Miney RUN

JoAnne walked down to the contestants,who were playing Go Fish, smiling...pleasantly..."What's with the creepy grin?" Charge asked, and did not notice Leah stealing some cards.

"Oh, nothing." JoAnne smiled again.

Flare looked at her. "Do we even want to know."

"Yesh. Yes, you do." JoAnne started laughing maniacally. "But first, let's introduce FREYA!"

A purple hedgehog ran in, also laughing. "You are SO not goi9ng to believe the challenge!"

Sky stood up. "Okay, I'm leaving. Yesterday."

"Wait." JoAnne smirked. "The challenge is..." She stopped and started laughing again, while Freya rolled on the ground.

Charge also got up. "For some reason, I'm scared now."

JoAnne tried to stop laughing. "You get to reennact the scene from Pirates of the Caribbean (finally I figure out how to do my fav movie!) Dead Man's Chest where the amazing, awesome, and-" Freya coughed and JoAnne blushed. "Yeah, he gets sacrificed by the cannibals."

*COnfessional Cam*

Charge's POV

"To which I can only say, WHAT?"

Leah's POV

"Oooh, a sacrifice! That's a good thing, right?"

Sky's POV

"Ddin't we already do cannabalism. A lot? Does she enjoy torturing us or something?"

Flare's POV

"Please tell me she's using an intern for Jack! PLEASE!"

Freya's POV

"I'm so excited! I get to be a cannabalist! I've always wanted to do that! Wait, what's cannabalism?"

Marina's POV

Marina was holding a knife and a very large fork. She glared hungrily ast the camera. "Food, yes, soon, soon, I shall have my FOOD!" SOTD, you have to pay for that camera!

JoAnne smiled at the contestants again. "Flare, you get to be Jack-"

*Confessional Cam*

Flare's POV

"GET ME OUT OF THIS MADHOUSE!"

"Freya, Sky, Marina, you're cannabalists."

*Confessional Cam*

Marina's POV

"FOOD TIME!"

Sky's POV

"Is she INSANE, or something?"

Freya's POV

"Yay! I get to-Wait, what's cannabalism again?"

"Charge, you're William, Leah, you're Elizabeth."

Later...

Flare sat on a large chair covered with something...furry. He glanced at the camera. "Help."

Nearby, Marina poked a growing fire while Freya gathered up anything and everything to throw into it. "Burn, baby, burn!" Sky stood nearby, reading a magazine, and trying to ignore the challenge.

CHarge was lifting up a sword. He grinned. "To rescue fair maiden, and leave idiot to burn!"

"Hey!" Flare glared at him. "You're not going to let me burn, right?"

"Course not, buddy. Then again, we ARE kinda hungry."

Leah looked at JoAnne. "What's the challenge again?"

JoAnne looked up from her camera. "Oh, you have to not die."

*Confessional Cam*

Flare's POV

"Comforting. Very comforting."

"And, ready, set, EAT!" JoAnne yelled.

"AFTER THE DRAGON!" Marina yelled, holdign up her silverware.

"FOOD TIME!" Freya screamed.

"MOMMY!" Flare jumped off the chair and started running around.

"This isn't the movie at all." CHarge muttered.

"No, but it's funnier!" JoAnne replied. "Now go save fair maiden."

"Can I let the idiot burn?"

"Not unless you want me sued."

"Okay, then. See ya never, Flare!"

*Confessional Cam*

JoAnne's POV

"Someone's paying for those lawsuits!"

Leah ran around, wavign a sword. "Oh, William, someone, save me!"

Flare ran past, followed by Marina the cannibal, Sky the ingorant, and Freya the crazy. "You look like you're doing fine!"

"I'm coming!" CHarge said, grabbing a vine. "TARZAN YELL!" He jumped down and I wish I could say he saved fair maiden, attacked the cannibals, and left Flare to burn, but unfortunately for JoAnne's lawsuits, he slammed into a cliff.

*Confessional Cam*

Charge's POV

"How was I supposed to know there was a cliff? It's not like it was right in front of me!"

JoAnne sighed. Leah was still running around, hoping for her idiot savior, Flare and the cannibals were hopefully gone, and Charge was in the hospital.

*COnfessional Cam*

Charge's POV

"We have a hospital?"

"TARZAN YELL!" A very familiar and fan girl attacting voice yelled. Shadow jumped on the vine Charge had uused, and flew by Leah (who was having a fainting fit), and slammed into a cliff.

*Confessional Cam*

Shadow's POV

"I was not payed for that!"

"Okay, okay, come over here!" JoAnne yelled. "Hmm, time to get rid of some of you." She closed her eyes. "Eeenie meenie miney-"

"EVERYBODY RUN!"

"Freya, Flare, Marina, Leah!" JoAnne yelled and turned tot he camera. "Who will win, Charge or Sky? Why do we care? And why are you still reading? AND WHO'S GOIGN TO PAY MY LAWSUITS?"


	15. Are We There Yet: Psycho Style

JoAnne smiled at Sky and Charge. "Geuss who gets a free trip to Tokyo?"

"Some poor unfortunate soul?" Charge asked hopuefully.

"Nope. Into the car unless you want to die."

"Which is worse, being locked in her car, or being dead?" Sky muttered, climbing in.

"Remind me what this has to do with movies." Charge said.

"It doesn't." JoAnne smirked. "But it's fun, eh?"

*Confessional Cam*

Sky's POV

"Anyone who can call being locked in a car on the way to Tokyo while being chased by psychos fun, has problems. BIG problems."

Charge's POV

"Even a million rings would not get me in that car." Charge's phone rang. "A BILLION? Okay. NOW that's money!"

"Good luck!" JoAnne slammed the door shut. "You'll need it!"

Later...

CHarge was playing ping pong in the front seat as the car drove on automatially. "I wonder where are those psychos JoAnne told us would be hunting-AAAAAAH!"

"CHAINSAW TIME!" A familiar purple hedgehog jumped onto the windsheild, holding a chainsaw. "EVERYBODY SING THE CHAINSAW SONG!"

At the Mansion...

"Hmm, I thought I killed her when she tried to steal my morning waffles. Ah well, long as I don't get a lawsuit."

"There's a chainsaw song?" Sky blinked, trying to hide under her seat.

"OOOH, HOW I LOVE A CHAINSAW, YES I LOVE MAH CHAINSAW! OH YES, IT'S A CHAINSAW! TO KILL YOU!"

Shadow suddenly appeared in the car with them. He glared at nothing and muttered. "Don't ask."

"SHADDYKUN!" Marina and Leah joined Eclipse on the windsheild, pressing their faces to the glass and writing disturbing things to Shadow.

"POPCORN!" Freya also got on.

"Let me outta here!" CHarge tried to break down the door.

"Do yuo really want to be out there with them?" Shadow asked.

CHarge stopped, and fell to the ground in shock. "We're trapped. Trapped between psychos and more psychos."

"In an automatic car going to Tokyo." Sky added. "Wait, what happens when we get to the ocean?"

"FIRE TIME!" Flare jumped on the trunk and vegan trying to melt the car.

"Are they on drugs or something?" Sky wondered.

"I hope not." Charge sighed, looking at the four hedgehogs in the front. "We've got a long way to go..."

5 Hours Later...

*Confessional Cam*

Sky's POV

"So we're in a car to Tokyo surrounded by chainweileding psychos, when it hits me: why not blackmail Shadow into Chaos Controlling us to Tokyo?"

Charge's POV

"So we're in the stupid car, and surrounded by pyschos, when I start thinking: Why not just quit, attack JoAnne later, and steal the money?"

"No and no." Shadow said, trying to hide from Leah, who was trying to use fangirl powers to do unspeakable things to Shadow.

"Why not?" Sky and Charge chorused. "Why, why why why why why why?"

"1. I'm too tired too, 2. I really don't feel like scraping up your dead bodies."

CHarge smirked. "Fine." He started to open the window on Leah's side.

"OKAY, OKAY!" Shadow got out a Chaos Emerald. "CHAOS CONTROL!"

In Tokyo...

JoAnne picked up a fluffy pink sweater. "Oh, cute!" Sky and Shadow appeared behind her. "Hello, Fangirl Attracter and TSA winner!" She greeted. "Where's CHarge?"

Shadow suddenly looked nervous. "Uh. I didn't purposely leave him behind to the mercy of fangirls!"

With Charge, who has been magically painted like Shadow...

"NO! NO, ANYTHING BUT THAT! NO! SHADOW, I'LL GET YOU-NO!"

Back With the Winner...

"Well, here's your money, Sky." JoAnne plopped a bag of money on Sky's head. "Now get outta here or pay my lawsuits."

"MONEYMONEYMONEYMONEYMONEY!" Sky danced around. Shadow sighed and Chaos Controlled her home.

JoAnne smirked at the camera. "Will my lawsuits ever get paid? What will Sky do with her money? WIll Charge survive the fangirls? Should I make a third season? And why are you still reading?"


End file.
